11-29-06

Dear blog,

Yesterday and the day before were relatively uneventful. Monday was kind of drawn out, but that is good news for me because the more time I spend in that place, the more money I get. By coming home and doing this immediately after work, I have myself on a cycle where I don't get tired until around 4:00 - 5:00.

For a couple weeks I have been doing internals after the sort shift ended. I've told you what internals are when you're on the belt - they are the packages that are missorted and have to be resent to the sort aisle and they always come out and drown the poor motherfucker closest to the internal dump-off.

But once the shift ends, "doing internals" meant something a lot less stressful. Basically, I stroll around with a gigantic cart, picking up missorts from their wrong destination and bringing them to their proper one. It takes about 30 to 45 minutes, and it's low-stress work. A great way to cool down after a high-stress shift on the aisle. And this time of year, they are all high-stress.

We got two new hires on the sort aisle this week, and they are - *gasp* - ladies! Two new chicks on our one aisle. Jen has to be beside herself in anger.

Are they good looking? Hard to tell. You see, working in the hub is like drinking a lot of beer. Suddenly, you see a woman, and she is the most beautiful thing you ever saw. But when you leave the hub and think back about her, you realize that you wouldn't have looked twice at her if you were anywhere else on Earth BUT that damn hub.

Ladies, if you want to get dates from a guy who, if nothing else, is pretty strong and probably in decent shape, go work at UPS. If you can't pick up a guy there, I'd really suggest switching teams.

Anyway, I think they are both solid, yet unspectacular. Would they get my attention if they were out on the street? Maybe not. But they certainly have my attention (and the attention of every other guy on the aisle, including the supervisor and both trainers) now.

Other than that, not much exciting to report.

I'll try and get to the other two blogs this afternoon. No promises.

11/27/06

Dear Blog,

Wow...a big weekend has past, and now I get to recap it all.

There was not a little bit of cunfusion at work Wednesday night - I was out of there around 4:00 - 4:30, not sure exactly when. Then at 2:00 Thursday afternoon we went over to my aunt Martha and her husband George's house for Thanksgiving dinner. I love Thanksgiving, mostly for the food; ironically, the turkey is the part of the meal I could most easily skip, with the stuffing, mashed potatoes, corn bread, pie, etc., etc., etc., being the treat. After Thanksgiving dinner it was football all evening, with me liking some of the results (Miami over BC) more than others (Dallas over Tampa Bay). Also, of course, I got to see the extended family again. No less than 25 people were at the dinner, and while I was not realted to all of them - my cousin Kerry's boyfriend and his parents, for example, or George's children from his first marriage - in fact, it was about 50/50. Anyway, it was a lot of fun.

Mom, dad, grandma, and Duncan went back to the Cape Thursday night, but Kait & I stayed back in Lowell to hang out with our cousins on Friday, the most enjoyable day I've had in the Lowell area so far. We actually spent the day in Concord, which is about 15 minutes away from Lowell, and the downtown kind of reminded me of downtown Annapolis the way there is a long line of shops along the street. There were 8 of us on the trip - Kait and I, Kerry, her boyfriend Brian, Geoff, Mark, Eric, and Eric's wife Adriana. We went into a coffee shop where I had an outstanding cup of hot chocolate and then over to an Inn/Bar to have some beers and nachos. Then we swapped Geoff out for Eric and Adriana'a baby, Andres, and headed over to our apartment, where we hung out. Basketball was on the TV (Butler's shocking win of the preseason NIT), but we were more interested in watching Andres explore the apartment, as well as talking to each other. Great night.

On Saturday, Kait and I finally made our way down to the Cape. I got to watch some decent football on Saturday, more than you would think with my grandma, who enjoys watching the game herself. Unfortunately, the Terps lost Saturday night, more on that in the sports' blog later this afternoon.

Sunday was more of the same - watching football at the Cape. As usual, I had to go to Din's to catch the Redskins game, but, unusually, I was able to leave the bar with a smile on my face as the Skins pulled out a 17-13 victory over Carolina, a very decent team that should find themselves in the playoffs this winter. Again, more on that in the sports blog, tomorrow. Sunday night came and the weekend finally ended, although I don't go back to work until 10:30 tonight. We headed back to Lowell, and here I am, writing in this blog.

Ok - college sports extravaganza later this afternon in the sports blog, as I'll do a football recap and prime the ACC/Big 10 basketball challenge, which starts this evening. Politics blog probably won't be updated until tomorrow.

11-22-06

Dear Blog,

My posting has become increasingly sporadic recently, and I worry that I'll stop posting entirely, which usually happens once I lose the routine of posting regularly. I'll have to do my best to keep that from happening. The reason for the break-up in posting is that the Holiday season is fast approaching, and I don't need to tell anyone how that makes us all busy.

At UPS the problem is intensified because with the coming Holidays comes increased volume; the dreaded PEAK SEASON is approaching, something about which the UPS vets all speak in hushed tones, as people my age may remember the Iraqi Elite Republican Guard was talked about back in the first Gulf War. We're only now getting into peak season, which means that coming home from work, I find myself a little spent - although still it is not nearly as bad as it was when I first started working there.

My sister's friend Steve Cohn visited yesterday, spending the night on our guest couch (it's a pull-out queen-size bed, people...). Steve is a funny guy who has pretty good stories, so we were glad to see him. Also, my cousin Mark dropped by yesterday evening. This was his second visit to the apartment, making him our most regualr visitor - one-time visitors include Steve, my friends Mark & Dan, Kait's friend Hans, and Kait's friend from work Kelly and her boyfriend, whose name I did not catch. Mark told me I looked like I had lost 50 lbs, which was encouraging. I've noticed the change in my arms, of course, but I haven't been able to track my weight loss, mostly because my weight issues in recent years have made me afraid of scales. If I am losing weight, it is not suprising, of course, as I am going from next to no exercise to about 4.5 hours worth a night. Anyway, if you want to get in shape, moonlight (literaslly) at your nearby UPS for a couple of months. They will cetainly be willing to take you on right now...

Tomorrow mom and dad will be arriving, bringing Grandma (and, presumably, Duncan) with them. Then it will be off to aunt Martha's house, where no fewer than 25 people will be gathered for a Thanksgiving dinner of epic proportions. I probably won't be able to blog tomorrow, but I can't imagine anyone woud be spending their Thanksgiving reading blogs, anyway.

I may post in the other blogs today, I'm not sure.

11-21-06

Dear Blog,

I haven't posted here in a while - there is a reson for that. Thursday morning I had written a terrific post when and I was just putting the finishing touches on it when my computer crashed, causing me great distress. So great, in fact, that this is the first time I have been able to bear the thought of going back here. There are other reasons, too, but that was the main one.

Anyway, the weekend was great. Grandma is up from Louisiana to visit us, which is fantastic. She can be a wee bit of a chore at times, but the fact is she is family, so it makes me happy to see her happy, and she is happiest when she is with us. Also, she is my last surviving grandparent so I have to cherish every moment I get to see her. I mean that.

I'm kind of tired right now and so I'm going to head to bed. Look for new posts on both the politics and sports boards later this afternoon - an extra-large one on the sports board because I have to wrap-up both of last week's NFL and college action.

11-15-06

Dear Blog,

Been a while since I got to this one. Saturday, Sunday, and Monday were pretty brutal on my constitution, man. I got no sleep at all on the ride to the airport or on the plane. I did manage to catch an hour's sleep at the reception of the first wedding (ceremony began: 11:00 AM) before I had to leave for the second one (ceremony began 2:00 PM). By the time that ceremony began, I had gone the last 25 hours with one hour's sleep. By the time the recpetion ended, that was up to 32 hours. By the time I left the afterparty, it was 34 hours since I had woken up on Friday afternoon, with a 1-hour nap being all the sleep I got in between. Then I got home and just slept like shit. I don't know if the bed was too small or what, but I got shit for sleep the rest of the weekend, and that was FOLLOWING the marathon session I pulled on Friday/Saturday. And on Monday night, I had to work. I got some really bad sleep in the van ride coming up, and a decent nap Monday evening, but I was still plenty tired. So, you can see why I wasn't up for a blog entry yesterday. I didn't even get up until 3 PM.

So, in that way, today was much better than yesterday. I am now properly rested for the first time in 96 hours, so I've recovered from my ordeal. But, in some ways tonight was worse. There was a high-stress moment in the beginning of work, when I kept getting these groceries people bought off of QVC, frozen in dry ice, sealed in slippery plastic, so the goddam things won't go up the shitty belt, so all the ones that go to the top shelves come back and hit you in the head if you don't stand them on end. Which is fine, but standing them on end takes time, and while you're doing that, the boxes are pouring in along with internals (Door 11 - or 12 if no one is in 11, are the worst fucking doors on sort aisle because those get all the internals - the packages which were missorted and must now be resorted, which is a double-dogg portion of pain-in-the-ass, because these are the ones which are hard to read - that is why they were missorted to begin with), and not only are the frozen foods coming down the belts, but about half the packages I send up there are also coming back, because the obnoxious top belts are so shitty they can't hold anything. So, ya, that was a rough time.

But like all rough times at that place, it was temporary and soon enough I did indeed find myself out of it. The rest of the night was relatively uneventful, although for some reason the place seemed to virtually shut down entirely early - about 2:45, but we stuck around doing clean-up stuff for like half-an-hour, before another truck arrived. By the time I clocked out, there were only 3 of us on sort aisel and I had worked almost 5 hours. But the last hour was really easy, so I'm glad that'll be on my check...I'd work 8 more hours like that if they'd asked me too.

So, I find myself here, now, writing in my blog. And I want to defend my favorite band, the one that I have liked since I was a kid.

Most anyone who would read this would know how big of a fan of theirs I've been and for how long. Those who know my e-mail address probably also know that the "gday" part of it does not indicate that I am Australian, or a particular fan of Paul Hogan (although I WAS a particular fan of the Crocodile Hunter - I always got a kick out of that guy. I even saw his movie - but that was because I worked in a theater at the time and movies were free. The movie is straight camp, of course, but it does have one of my favorite lines in movie history. I'm not going to tell you the line, because it is a waste of a good line, since it won't read nearly as funny as it was in context. See the movie - you can probably buy it in WalMart in the bargain bins for like $2.00. But the Crocodile Hunter came well after I made up my e-mail address, which has gone unchanged for years), but rather is a testament to my level of fandom for the band at that time. Which was high, but come on, I was in prime fanboy years.

Anyway, Green Day have made me proud to have been on board with them as I've watched them grow up as a band. I don't have to endure questions like "remember what it was like when you were all into that whoosit band who had that one song but then fell off the face of the Earth?" Because I still AM a fan; I'm not as "into them", maybe, but that doesn't mean I like them any less. They are the once-or-twice in a generation bands that manage to stick around for over a decade (it has been 12 years since Green Day burst onto the scene in 1994 with Dookie, and 15 since they put out their first LP, 1991's 1,039 Smoothed Out Slappy Hours) by growing as a band an constantly evolving and reinventing yourself.

And it's true that when the band first came out they were a bunch of Berkley kids who were singing 3 minute songs about masturbation or smoking weed (the band's name is, in itself, a drug reference - I'm sorry for going all John Madden on you, but I have no idea who might be reading this thing) and apathy, but it's not fair to pin a band down to how they might have been at another time, if, in the interval, they have grown up a lot. I mean, can you imagine someone coming out and saying the Beatles were overrated, and his evidence is the song "Love, Love, Me Do"?

It's when the popular bands grow up that they are allowed to have any influence. Just like the Beatles would never have gotten the creative leeway from their record labels if they hadn't first established themselves as megastars with songs like "Love Me Do" and "She Loves You", Green Day would have had a hell of a hard time getting a label with the kind of distribution power of Reprise's to publish a concept album basically attacking the President of the United States without first releasing the requisite Dookies and Insomniacs - although even by Insomniac you started to see the first signs of maturing. And now that they have that power, they are using it, and they are using it for our side. So please, don't jusge Green Day by the band they have been. Ignore their past, and just listen to the album, and ask yourself, is this really good? Because, I might not have their poster on my wall, but I do think this is there greatest album, and by a good bit. Just as I thought that each of their albums was better than the one before it.

College Primer on the Sports Blog. I'm sure something will catch my eye to blog about on the Political blog - in fact, I have a good idea what that might be.

11-11-06

Dear Blog,

It's Veteran's Day, which is extremely cool because I get Holiday pay on Veteran's Day, whether I would actually work that day or not. So, basically, I'm getting paid a full day's wages for a Saturday while I'm 500 miles away.

I don't usually write on a Saturday, but our plane leaves at 6:45, which means we have to leave here for the airport at 5:00. So, I don't have time to do anything else between now and then but write in this blog. I can't sleep, because all sleeping for half-an-hour will do is piss me off when I have to get up. And I can't watch a movie. I can't even get a decent DOOM session out of 30 minutes. So, I'll write.

Today's big event was my haircut. I called the place up at around 1:00 and asked to make an apoointment that afternoon. The guys tells me to come in at around 2:30. It's a short walk to the place - I love this about living downtown. So much is within walking distance it's not even funny. And in Lowell, you don't have to worry about getting beat up or shot.

After that it was mostly nothing. Kait came in about 4:00-ish, we sat around and watched TV - two episodes of CSI, and then Scrubs and the Daily Show/Colbert Report. Then I turned it onto the football game (UTEP beat UAB 36-17 - but I left after the 3rd quarter, and Kait went to bed.

Work today went really well for about 4/5 of the shift, but then the unloaders started sending up all these tape-ups (tape-ups, as you may have guessed, are packages that need to be taped up; the unloaders are supposed to catch them all theoretically, or some of them, in practice). I mean, it was like they were throwing any damn thing on the belt, no matter how the contents were spilling out. So that extended our shift by 15-30 minutes. When this week's check comes, I'll be happy about that, but tonight it wasn't too pleasing. If I had an hour instead of a half-hour, I'd be playing DOOM right now; and starting to get into it, too.

This is a funny story, so I'll retell it here (if you have seen me since I wrote this entry (i.e., since 5:00 Saturday morning), skip this paragraph, as you've heard the story. As I was leaving work, I was carrying on my usual dialect with myself as I walked past the lockers that the employees can use to store their valuables whilst they work. The lockers are on a black platform, only slightly elevated, with two steps leading up to the platform. On the steps, which are also black, is written, in large, yellow, capital letters: "NO SITTING". I said, "Damn, and I really wanted to park my ass there, too." I kept walking, and about ten feet later I walk past this huge open bay door (there are bay doors all around the facility so the Brownies can drive in and out - I don't have to tell you what the Brownies are, do I?) looking out into "the yard", as we call the huge paved area where all the trucks, big and small, are driving all round. Right in front of the door, on the yard side, is an area marked off with a big yellow painted line, and it said in that space, in HUGE capital yellow letters: "NO PARKING". Well, I read that and said, "You can't do anything here. Is this hub located in America or not?" Right as I said that I walked into the space in the hub where a bunch of Brownies are parked, and hanging over all the Brownies is this enormous American flag. I realize that this is a had-to-be-there story in a way, but this was the funniest thing that had happened to me in a long time so I thought I would mention it.

After work I went to the gas station across the highway from where I work to buy my after-work snack. Usually, just come to the apartment and eat Taquitos, but we ran out of them only recently so I had to pick something up. Anyway, while I'm walking around I'm debating myself about what to get, and I'm doing this out-loud. I get to the register and the foreign guy says, "You talk with yourself?". I said, "Ya, it keeps my mind limber." As I walked out of the place, I thought to myself, "And I've got a funny story about that..."

I've stopped caring who knew about that kind of crap and what they thought about it because I've come to a startling ralization over the past couple of years. We are all fucking crazy, it's just a matter of degrees. So, being insecure about it is just a complete waste of time. Example - my cousin Kerry is, I believe, 3 years older than me. She was always babysitting us when we were kids and we would go up to Massachusetts, so I looked at her, from my childhood, as sort of an authority figure, and from the way she carried herself when she was around us, I always assumed she was the most well put-together mentally of the whole lot of us. Then Kait is retelling me this story. Kerry and one of her brothers, who are, I think, 30 (they're twins), are having a disagreement of some sort or another, and her brother tells her something along the lines of, "I wish you'd never been born." I'm paraphrasing here, I do not know the exact quote. What I do know is, it is the kind of thing you would say that is so over-the-top, there is no way in Hell anyone would take you seriously. Well, Kerry took it seriously. And she wouldn't talk to whoever it was for like a week. As Kait was telling me this my eyes got wide. "I didn't know Kerry was so...fragile." It later occured to me that by "fragile" I meant crazy. I guess I wasn't ready for that revelation. But ever since then I've been looking at everyone I meet and, yeah - they're all fucking nuts. The only question is - how nuts? Coz after a certain amount we have to put you away. But we're all there, to some degree or another. And quite frankly, my quirks are downright charming compared to the way some of the freaks are so unglued.

'Dena this weekend. Can't wait to see the homies.

11-10-06

Dear Blog,

I decide just the date would make a good title for each entry, as opposed to having to come up with something new each morning and ending up saying jack-assed things like "Hump Day" (I really, really apologize for that...I couldn't feel worse).

Anyway, it was another productive day at work. And I actually mean that - it was payday. Check's a little bigger this week, which is good because I'm going to be a vusy beaver this weekend, back in the ol' stomping grounds for a wedding doubleheader. I'm gonna be so fucking tired by the end of Saturday night that I'm going to spend all Sunday laying on the couch. Then Sunday night I'll go do something else. It'll be good to see everyone.

Other than that, nothing too interesting. We got dinner from the Chinese place right down the street. I love living in downtown - I called in the order, walked to the place from my apartment, and actually had to wait 5 minutes there. It was the first time I have called in an order and walked there - next time I'll know to wait a few minutes before I leave. It is very good - we are pretty psyched to have Chinese this good this conveniently located - and we usually only end up paying $10 a person. Certainly manageable on a once a week basis.


Goodness gracious, I am still so pumped from the combined power of the Terrapins great win Saturday, piggybacking on the Redskins ridiculous win Sunday, piggybacking on the Democrats whoopin' that Republican ass all the way into submission.

And what do we see, over yonder? Could it be? Yes, the right-wingers are freaking out. Yessir, this is only the beginning. Over the next two years we are going to see the ugliness of the Republican Party fully on display. And I'm not talking about the politicians, I'm talking about the supporters. When our Party is out of power (or even in power) liberal political activists can be annoying. We'll fucking be out on the street, asking for signatures for a petition or we'll be throwing some sort of political march or another, clogging up the streets and disrupting traffic. They can be a tad overzealous in their desire to draw attention to their issues. But Righty political activists, when they are out of power, turn downright ugly. I urge everyone to listen to Rush Limbaugh, just once, and hear the way he sneers when he says the name "Nancy Pelosi", like she was Osama bin Laden his own damn self. In fact, I dont believe he uses any kind of sneer when he says bin Laden's name. Not that he mentions him that much, since W. has failed to apprehend him in any way. No sir, the ugliness will be there. If you can walk into a room full of Republicans and hear them talking to each other - you'd be scared shitless. These people HATE anybody who isn't them. Is that the kind of person you want to hitch your political bandwagon to?

Post-post Election Day

Dear Blog,

Sorry about the unimaginative Entry Title, but honestly this Election thing has completely changed my outlook on life. It's like I'm on meds, or something. The days of the country being ruled over by the richest rich controlling the dumbest Dumb are past. I'll have a decent summary of the Elections - now that we know who has the Senate - on the politics blog. Check the sports blog for a preview of this week's college ball action.

Other than still being high from the Elections, today was a rather mediocre day. The weather sucked. I made fish and thought that I had fucked something up real bad, but everything turned out OK - even the fish. So that was a little bit of a roller coaster.

Work - bleh. Nothing too horrible (now that I think about it, I rarely have a "bad" day, compared to how many I had when I first started working there, which was most of the time. Either things don't bother me as much, or I am getting much better, or a combination of both. I hope it's the combination...), but not a really great night, either. Oh, I forgot to mention yesterday, but Tuesday Night/Wednesday Morning we finally had our pizza party for seniority graduation. I'm still waiting for something else they owe me for passing the cert tests, but they assure me it's coming. Now, that was a good night. I even got sent to North Sort for the last half-hour or so, and it wasn't too bad. So, things were going my way.

I gotta tell you, I've been on such a role of good things happening to me lately that I'm as happy as I've ever been, although I miss seeing my friends. I can get in touch with many of them over the internet, but that's not really the same, either. I'm going down to Pasadena this weekend for a couple of weddings. It'll be good to be back there again. Hey, that's just another good thing happening to me, again! Score!

Of course, the biggest thing to happen is the Elections. Ladies and Gentlemen of America, we thank you for finally crossing over to our side. Like I said in the political blog, we aren't going to judge you for making the decision a little later than, perhaps, you should have. You're one of us, now.

That being said, let me welcome you to the most satisfying part of leaving the Dumb People behind: you get to have taste, now. The Dumb People call it "sophistication"; as in, "we ain't sophisticated, or nothin'." But all it really means is, you can differentiate between what is good, and what sucks. When someone says he isn't "sophisticated", what he is really saying is that he is too dumb to be able to pick out what he likes from among the tons of crap being force-fed to him. That's it. Any other definition is being Kind. Kind is good, sometimes. But not in a blog. Blog is for Mean and Condescending - at least, when you're talking about your enemies.

But I'm among friends, here! Yes, you folks, the ones who read every now and then, you guys when wholeheartedly our way. The right had it's usual collection of freaks, geeks, and whole-sale lunatics, but the key vote was the ole "one in the middle." Middle America became our America - right down to goddam Ohio! If the Democrats were smart, they'd nominate Paul Hackett for President. That motherfucker could be elected Pope if he tried hard enough for it. That guy has Clintonian charisma. And I don't mean the Junior Senator from New York.

But I'm digressing. Taste! That's it. You can have taste, now. You couldn't have taste among the Dumb People, because they mock you for it. "Ooooh, look who drinks expensive beer now!" Anyone who has ever told you that, when they spotted you with a Sam Adams or even a Yuengleng, I guarantee you is still bummed about Tuesday's election. They HATE people with taste. Mostly because they hate themselves.

You see, "redneck" is a term used to describe the vast unwashed horde. It's been an insult forever because not a single trait describing a redneck constitutes as "wholesome" or "desireable". But the rednecks have adopted the term and use it on themselves. That they call themselves an insult illustrates the self-loathing. Because the redneck has been sold a line that hasn't worked anywhere in the Western World since the Enlightenment: that if you have money than you are "better" than someone without it. And if you have less money, there is something wrong with you and you don't deserve to have anything. That is now a uniquely American belief. And when you are able to sell a poor person that line - that they don't have taste because they were born without the ability to have taste - it becomes self-loathing. So, you lash out. You lash out at anyone different than you, whether be they more educated, a different color, whether they speak a different language, or worship differently. Hate hate hate. But who is it that you really hate?

The truth is, anyone can have taste, even the Dumbest of the Dumb. But you have to want it. And they don't want it. You've moved past them. You've seen what they have to offer, and you ultimately rejected it. Now, welcome to the club.

The first thing you need to do is read, read, read. All those movies you liked that were based on a book - go get the book. It really is better - we're not just making that part up. Everyone tells you the book was better, and it's almost always true (although I wouldn't tackle Lord of the Rings, just yet). The only times it's reversed is when you get a book that nobody really liked (like, say, The Devil Wears Prada, which even my sister, who enjoys that kind of shi- err, literature, said it was unspectacular) and make it with a bunch of ridiculously good thespians (like, say, Merryl Streep).

Digressing again. If you find that you enjoy the book as much as you probably will, keep reading that author. Go to the library and ask the librarian for other authors like him/her. Read as much as you can. But don't read EVERYTHING - if something sucks, stop reading it; that's the essence of taste. But try to expand what you think of as "good". And if you read something being referenced and you don't know what it is - that's what Google is for. Literature likes to reference the same things, over and over. It'll take you no time to memorize about 3/4 of the stuff you'll find in modern literature. And the other 1/4 is so obscure, if you talk to anyone about it's meaning, they'll know you looked it up. The fucking authors had to look that shit up.

Fucking Dennis Miller does that shit non-stop. He looks up some obscure fucking factoid, brings it out with him, and just does his best to work it into the routine, and you feel like an asshole because he "obviously" knows so much more than you.

Yes, Literature is full of fucking authors who are full of themselves, but no more full of themselves than the average Pro Athlete or movie star. Just like those guys, these fellows are in the tippy-top of their profession, it's just their checks are smaller and most people haven't heard of them. Still, when is the last time you ever heard of a famous literary author got arrested for firing his gun in the air outside a bar or beating some dude up with a phone?

Once we get you reading, we can get you into watching some good movies, but we'll get to that another time.

Election Post-Day

Dear blog,

Man, I can't believe the results are here now. I've been waiting for this moment for a long time. I think I'll soak it in for a while...

Honestly, now, I feel more nervous than anything. I've spent the day in kind of a hazy self-confidence; I was so sure we were going to win this time, and win big. Now, though, that the prospect of having the results right in front of me anytime I finally want to look at them, the nervousness sinks in. Sure, if things didn't go as well as expected, I could always chant the "progressives always win, eventually" mantra - and it's true - but you want to see electoral success. You want to see the future come...fast. And you want it to happen in this country - the country that, 230 years ago, brought the world into the future just by its inception.

Was I too cocky? Sure the Democrats had won key races in places like Pennsylvania and Rhode Island, but what if Kerry's stupid, stupid gaffe with the Dems up by 2 with :01 on the clock cost the Dems the game in places like Montana and Virginia? It doesn't take much to keep those states from turning blue?

But we had Ohio, too, the optimist in me counters. Just check the damn results already.

Ok, ok... (I'll write my reaction as soon as I have it ...)

...

Oh my God...Oh my God...

It was a washout. Almost total.

The Senate seats show 49-49, with two races still counting. If I had to guess, it would be Montana and Virginia. We'll find out. The Dems have taken over the House by a whopping majority (it actually whops!). With 17 seats still too close to call the Democrats have already taken 227 seats - 9 more than a majority with almost a dozen-and-a-half more contests to call!

Also, the Democrats now have 28 Governorships...6 more than they had coming into tonight and, obviously, a majority.

I'll have the complete results in the political blog. Also, I'm ending this blog entry right now. (Pizza for dinner, if you're interested)

Election Day

Well, well, well, kids - it's Election Day. Time to go flex the muscles granted to us by our most brilliant of forefathers - the right to vote is the most sacred political right a free man can have. In fact, I would say that constitutes the difference between "free" and "slaves".

Of course, it's not the only right, and sometimes people, in a sweep of hysteria, the people can be willing to give up their rights. That the forefathers foresaw this can be used effectively in the arguement that there is a God. Anyway, Bill of Rights contains the second most sacred law - and also the difference between "free" and "slaves" - the right to dissent. When the rights to free speech and the right to vote are untouchable, then a society of human beings are, indeed, "free".

Anyway, on my political blog I'll do two updates today - one this morning before I have to drive all the way down to Cape Cod (that's where I'm registered to vote), and another this evening before I head home to work. Of course, the most coverage will be in tomorrow morning's post, as I'll be posting almost immediately after the final votes are tallied. In other words, when you wake up tomorrow, you can look here for all the results. Of course, a better place to look would be DK or TPM. Or BBC's page, if you like your news truly non-partisan.

(How can Americans expect any news network to cover American politics "objectively"? If you want objective coverage, go to another country's news source - they have nothing personal to gain whichcever side wins or loses. And fortunately for us, the British have a great news source, and it's in English - so all you xenophobes won't have to *shudder* learn a new language yourselves.)

Today was a pretty decent day for me at work (after a taco dinner which definately needed more meat next time), until the end of my shift. With about 1/2 hour to go, I got sent over to North Side. That place is chaos. The shift sup gets panicky when things get close to close, as it were, and his whole aisle picks up on that. Whenever I go to North Side by the time I get dismissed when I go back to the South Side my aisle is gone. The difference between stress levels is enormous, especially at the end of the shift.

Anyway, Sports Blog will have the updated NFL Power Rankings. I haven't calculated them out yet, but I'll be interested to see where these teams stack up after a crazy week of pro ball - to go along with the crazy week of college ball (I was one happy motherfucker this weekend; I watched no fewer than 6 games this weekend with a passionate rooting interest and the team I was rooting for won no fewer than 6 times. Maryland, Dracut High, Louisiana State, the Redskins, the Giants - they were my survival league team this week, and the Colts - sorry, Patriots' fans, I like Peyton Manning, and I hope he wins one just to shut you fuckers up about him - it was just one joyous outcome after another - like I was magic or something, AND I was cheering for 4 underdogs).

Ok, no rant today - not on this blog, anyway. My rant this morning is posted on the politics board. If I don't mind saying, it's a must read for you Republican friends of mine.

Anyway, See you (briefly) tomorrow here, but TOTAL COVERAGE ALL DAY - 3 POSTS IN THE NEXT 24 HOURS! - on the politics board...

Another weekend passed...

Dear Blog,

Another weekend has come and gone, and while I'm upset to see it go, I can reflect happily on what was, overall, a very good couple of days.

Friday night was a bit hectic at the hub. We, once again, did not get our seniority graduation party, although we're told that "it's coming." For the end of the shift, I got sent over to North side.

North side is an odd aisle to work. First of all, everything is backwards. The incoming, orange, and small sort belts (the ones that run in front of the sorter) run in the opposite directions as their counterparts on Southside, and the belts behind the sorter are all arranged as a mirror image of the belts in the southside. In addition, whereas our supervisor is generally a low-key guy who doesn't get on our cases much, the Northside supervisor is more of the hard driver type. In cae you're wondering which approach works more efficiently - well, the sample size is small, but our aisel always seems to be the first one out. Just saying...

Anyway, Saturday was good fun. Kait's High School had their Homecoming game at 4:00 and their dance at 7. I went to the game with her (not the dance, obviously), and we watched while they beat Lowell High - the High School of the city where we live, which has a student body about 4 times the size of Kait's school (and about 3 times the size of Chesapeake) by two touchdowns. We left for that game immediately after Dan Ennis kicked the game winning field goal for Maryland to put them past Clemson (on the road) and keep them in a tie for first place in the Division. Then, I got back in time to watch LSU beat Tennessee, also on the road, also on a play with fewer than 10 seconds to go - a TD pass, this time.

We went to the Cape late Saturday night, and then on Sunday I got up just in time to watch the first half of the Redskins/Cowboys game and then we went to Dino's (the local sports bar, which has the Sunday Direct Ticket package and abotu a hazillion TVs) and caught the second half, featuring the most spectacular ending I have ever seen. NOTE: many of you may accuse me of having poor memory, since the Redskins had a similarly memorable comeback win last season against the same Cowboys, but the thing a lot of people forget about that game is that the Redskins struck so quickly that although the comeback started with about 4:00 to play, the Skins had taken the lead with over 2 minutes remaining. With today's game, I went from thinking the Redskins could win with 35 seconds left, to knowing the Cowboys would win with 6 seconds left, to celebrating - vocally - as the Redskins did win with no time on the clock. I've never been on that kind of a roller coaster before. Not even with the Monday Night Miracle.

We drove back on Sunday night, in time to catch the second half of the Pats/Colts game. And now, here I sit, typing away early on a Monday Morning.

I've got a great bit from Bill Mahr's show Friday Night on my political blog, and I'll put up the college wrap-up right away - certainly by the time you read this.

Ta ta.

End of the week

Dear Blog,

Thank God it's Friday, as they say. Although this week has not been a particularly bad one, save for the godawful Tuesday night. Even last night, which went on pretty long thanks to the California trucks, went at a decent pace. I wouldn't say I was particularly stressed at any point.

Anyway, last night I made a chicken alfredo casserole for dinner, and it came out pretty decently, except that I need to make the chicken strips smaller next tome and add much more garlic. But for something I have never tried before, it was pretty successful...I'll have to add that one to the rotation.

I'm trying to think about something else interesting that happened yesterday and I'm coming up blank, sorry.

I don't know if you've heard it yet, but Staind has come out with an acoustic cover of Pink Floyd's "Comfortably Numb" that is all over the radio station that plays at my work. And I'm here to tell you, it is godawful. I mean, I'm not one of those guys who thinks that you should never cover a good song, but if you are going to do it, you damn sure better do it right, and this is about the furthest from "doing it right" that you can come. First of all, the song is about going to the doctor's office and getting shot up with painkillers until you're completely stoned, and everything about that song, from the lyrics to the music in the background, is there to simulate that experience. So to do an acoustic version of the song couldn't be any more retarded. I want to make a good analogy, but I can't think of anything that would be as out of place as an acoustic version of comfortably numb. Maybe, remaking Caddyshack, except casting Freddie Prinze, Jr. as Danny Noonan, James Woods as Judge Smails, Sean Penn as Ty Webb, Morgan Freeman as Carl Spackler, and leaving Rodney Dangerfield's character out completely and making it the heartbreaking story of a young caddy struggling against the class-divisions of a local country club with the help of his mentor and a kindly old groundskeeper with sage advice, who is tragically killed after the Judge catches him sleeping with his neice. Or, remaking Shawshank Redemption and casting Adam Sandler as Andy Dufresne, Robin Williams (the Death to Smoochy Robin Williams, not the Good Will Hunting Robin Williams) as Red, and Jim Carrey as the Warden, and making it the goofy story of a wrongfully imprisoned banker and his hilarious escapades as he tries to escape from prison. In other words, no.

And if that's not bad enough, the singer sounds like he is being beaten throughout the whole song. Has he always sounded this bad, and I just wasn't paying attention because he wasn't butchering one of my favortie songs, or was this just a bad performance because, I don't know, his girlfriend brokw up with him as he was about to go onstage and he had to load up on heroin first? Either way, the song should never have seen the light of day, and yet the fucking station at my work keeps playing it. Damn them all to Hell.

The Calm After the Storm

Dear Blog,

Compared to the hellish evening I had Tuesday night, last night went over nice and easy. I started out on the truck right by the internals, so at times it would be like I was unloading two trucks (which is completely impossible), and if that wasn't bad enough, the dude behind me had paper load, so dumping my excess over to him wasn't really an option I could go back to. But that didn't last long, and the rest of the night passed by uneventfully... we were out before 3:00.

I got up kind of late today, about 4:00ish. I dropped off the rent check, and, later, headed on over to the supermarket to pick up some cheese. Wednesday night is pizza night. When I went to the store on Monday (that's when I usually go...I only go again during the week if I made some really important error on Monday - like forgetting to bring home mozzarella cheese), they didn't have a premade shell, so I brought a thing of Betty Crocker's pizza dough you make by adding water. I decided to try my hand on it. The results weren't completely disasterous - we could still eat the pizza and it was still good enough to call good (although Chourico, it turns out, isn't the best pizza sausage...I recommend spicy italian), but the crust was substandard, and I'll be going back to the ready-made shells full time (or at least until I get a damn rolling pin). They had 32 oz bottles of Tropicana Twister - usually 1.99 a pop - on sale for 4 for a dollar because they were Halloween themed. Apparently they don't like the merchandise on their shelves to be for passed holidays. Anyway, I never had the stuff before, and I will say this - it's ok. And, I'm kind of pissed I only bought 4 of them. I mean, I understand that I had never tried them before, and maybe I would hate them. But even if that was the case, I would be more upset about the energy I was using up dumping the bottles down the toilet than I would be upset about the money I had invested had I purchased, say, 8 of them. So, anyway...


After I wrote the Jeanne story, I wrote that I didn't know what the moral of the story was, or if there was one. Well, upon further reflection, there certainly is.

Jeanne has been manipulated her entire life by outside forces who have wanted to use her exceptional looks to meet their own ends. The problem is, she has basically sacrificed her own personality to accomodate everyone she meets. The fact is, if you try to make everyone happy, you end up making no one happy. And if you're willing to live your entire life by whatever edict you run into, then there are plenty of people willing to tell you what to do. But understand that you're essentially selling your soul. You're letting them take your you away.

Whatever you do, don't let them take your you away.

College ball primer in the sports section later on this afternoon. Politics section feature TBA.

Unhappy Halloween

Dear Blog,

I realize now that last week I referred to Wednesday as "Hump Day" not once, but twice. I don't know what came over me, but I assure you it will never happen again. I apologize.

Halloween started off pleasantly. The kids started coming around 5:00 and lasted until 8. Kait got a real kick seeing all the costumes. Halloween is always a fun holiday-type-thing (I'm union now - "holiday" only means any day I don't work but get paid anyway). I made the steak fajitas I like to make. Couldn't be simpiler, btw. You marinade the steak in olive oil, some lemon or lime juice (whichever one you prefer - I find they both blow my socks off, so I like to mix it up), a few cloves of garlic, mashed up (how much garlic, of course depends on how much you like garlic, so me I put in a boatload...if you don't like garlic, btw, go away right now; I forbid you to read from this journal), some cumin, and some chilli powder overnight. The next day, you cut up half a red onion and a green pepper, chop up a couple more cloves of garlic (you can see why I really like this recipie) and first cook the steak - just a couple minutes on each side, then take the steak out but leave the juices in, and cook the garlic, pepper, and onion for like, 5 minutes, warm up the tortilla' s and then just serve it with some salsa and/or guacomole - once again, I recommend making your own guacomole, if you can figure out how to do it right, the rewards are everlasting. Fuckin' delicious, I promise you.

But once I got to work, things got really unpleasant. First of all, I forgot to change from my sneakers to my boots, which is important to the company that you don't do, but you can get away with it as long as no one looks at your shoes. Well, someone did look at my shoes. And so I had to go back to the apartment to get them over break. I was going to be late anyway, but on the way back I ran into two separate red lights that lasted several minutes each. It was a goddam nightmare.

When I got back, things got worse. All of a sudden the belts were working sporadically, so every so often you had to stack packages that go to a certain belt around your feet, and while you're building this stack you are also sorting the other packages that come in so you can't just build this anywhere. And then, once the belt gets moving again, you get to send the whole stack (while you can - the belt is only minutes away from stopping again), again, while sorting the incoming packages. Then small sort shut down. And then I got sent to the head of the aisle, where I dealt with a truck and the internals (internals are packages which were missorted and now are coming back to the sort aisle for another go round. Needless to say, a lot of these packages don't have a human readable - see an earlier post for more on human readables...). Then shit hit the fan, hardcore.

Small sort is the belt right in front of our feet, below the belt where the packages come in, which is waist high. Head high there is another shelf - the orange shelf, where all the packages headed to the Boston area go. All the other shelves are behind us (I use the words "shelf" and "belt" almost interchangeably - it's not always that way; you have to understand that some shelves have two belts...neither of the shelves I just mentioned, though, are like that, so in their case "belt" and "shelf" are, in fact, interchangeable). Anyway, small sort, as you may expect from the name, is where the small packages go; small in this case meaning any package as big as, or smaller than, a shoe box AND (not or) 5 pounds or lighter (You'd be suprised how many packages that you can fit in the cup that you make with your hands weigh 10, 20, 30 lbs, or even more. One time, I had a whole damn truckload, it seemed, of 45-pound boxes that couldn't have been larger than 5 inches, cubed. Luckily they all went to one of the bottom shelves - behind me, not small sort - and I didn't have to get these fuckers up to an over-my-head belt, shotput-style). But that shelf shuts down about the same time every night, about 20-30 minutes before the trucks run out. So when small sort shuts down, it's a pain in the ass, because now you have to sort all the tiny-assed packages yourself, instead of passing the buck to the folks in small sort, but you know the end of your shift is coming up. Usually.

Unless, of course, right after small sort comes down the truck you're unloading has half a goddam truckload full of small sort bags. Small sort bags are large canvas bags that are filled with small packages all bagged up for the convienence of us (something actually convenient for the sorter - take notes, because they're aren't too many more of these), so we can just throw the bag down at our feet. Unless the bags are destined for other hubs, in which case you simply sort the bag as you would a regular package. But the bags that go down to your feet, once small sort shuts down, you in the aisle are responsible for anything that is still with you or will arrive afterwards. And you can't just dump the bags while you sort other packages - you'd have to take the time and dump the bag THEN sort the god-knows-how-many-until-you-open-it packages, all while you're getting more packages from the truck and the internals? No way. You can open a bag and sort one if you have a dry spot, but until then you have to let them pile at your feet. And pile they did. I had a goddam castle around me today - a veritable fortress. By the time the trucks finally finished (and THAT was late as hell) we still had to pick up, empty, and sort all the fucking bags that had piled up, all the other boxes which had piled up because we couldn't move quick enough because of the goddam bags, and all the fucking tape-ups. Tape-ups are all of the packages that need to be taped up (try and mask your suprise); supposedly the unloaders should be getting the bulk of the tape-ups whereas we only get the few that they somehow miss, but the reality is far more tape ups get through the unload section than get caught by the unloaders (who I won't say anything about, other than that they are the ones who get the simpilest job - you know what I'm saying?). Anyway, we got blasted tonight with tape-ups along with the rest of the disaster. By the time we finally got all the shit cleaned up, I was definately ready to go home.

But tonight was the worst night I've had there, and by a long ways. Sometimes, the job gets annoying, of course, but if you keep in mind that working hard there could get you a decent job later on, it's not overcomeable. For me, once I get home, I'm no longer worried about anything work-related. It's one of the joys of working manual labor, I suppose (inasmuch as there are any...my fucking guns are another, though - Jesus, I could whoop someone's ass). So if tonight is the worst this place has, bring it on!

Actually, it's not the worst the place has. Peak season is coming up, and that, obviously, is when things get really busy. And about a half-a-million motherfuckers all get the urge to send Vermont Teddy Bears to everyone they goddam know, and every single one of those little furry shits goes right through our hub. I've dealt with them before, sometimes 20 boxes in a load, all right on top of each other. They are obnoxious, but I've never seen a whole truckload of them. But by then, I'll be ready. If I can make as much prgress this month as I made last month, then I'll be plenty ready for peak.

I was going to write a big ol' thing on the moral of the story I told last night (I figured out what it was), but I'm far too exhausted from merely relaying to you today's events. Tomorrow, look for an entry in the sports section about the start of the NBA season, and the politics blog will have an entry on whatever story catches my eye in the news tomorrow.

Mahalo.