4/26/07
Dear Blog,
Not much has happened since Monday, so I'll use this post to talk about a couple of movies I've watched On Demand the last few days.
First is DOOM. Now, I don't expect much from a DOOM movie, but it should, in theory, resemble the game on which it is supposedly based. In other words, I want to see a space marine battle back legions of Hell's troops. Instead, there was no Hell. The "demons" were really just zombies on steroids, by-products of bio-engineering gone wrong. And there weren't legions of them, there were about a dozen.In other words, it wasn't DOOM at all - it was Resident Evil in space. I don't want to see Resident Evil in space, I want to see DOOM. DOOM has demons from Hell. You know, like where Satan lives? This movie didn't even have the CyberDemon in it. For the uninitiated, a DOOM movie without the CyberDemon is on par with making a Star Wars video game and not bothering to include Darth Vader. It was just completely half-assed. If they bothered to do it right, it could have become one of the all-time great cult classics. Instead, it's just an obvious half-hearted cash grab. 1 star (for the admittedly awesome FPS sequence).
The second movie I saw this week was the just as bloody and about 100x as good 1986 classic, Platoon. Now, even though Platoon is only the second best Vietnam movie starring a Sheen (following Apocalypse Now), it's still a damn fine piece of cinema - one of the few from the 1980s that still holds up (others include ET, Bull Durham, Field of Dreams, Star Wars Episodes 4 and 5, The Natural - hmm, a lot of baseball movies on that list...). Look for a very young Johnny Depp - you'll be shocked when you see how young he looks, if you've never seen it before. Also on the cast list are Willem Dafoe, Tom Berenger, and Forest Whitaker. It's quite amazing what a great cast can do for a movie. Four stars. My list of the best war movies I've ever seen now looks like this...
1. Apocalypse Now
2. MASH
3. Dr. Strangelove: Or, How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Bomb
4. Full Metal Jacket
5. Platoon
6. Lawrence of Arabia
7. Saving Private Ryan
8. Slaughterhouse V
9. Bridge over the River Kwai
10. Braveheart
The worst war movie I've ever seen, by the way, is Windtalkers, which is a crime, considering the story it tried to tell. It's also a crime because I'm fairly sure it was the reason I went on one and only one date with a pretty hot girl.
Ok, sports tomorrow. Till then...
Not much has happened since Monday, so I'll use this post to talk about a couple of movies I've watched On Demand the last few days.
First is DOOM. Now, I don't expect much from a DOOM movie, but it should, in theory, resemble the game on which it is supposedly based. In other words, I want to see a space marine battle back legions of Hell's troops. Instead, there was no Hell. The "demons" were really just zombies on steroids, by-products of bio-engineering gone wrong. And there weren't legions of them, there were about a dozen.In other words, it wasn't DOOM at all - it was Resident Evil in space. I don't want to see Resident Evil in space, I want to see DOOM. DOOM has demons from Hell. You know, like where Satan lives? This movie didn't even have the CyberDemon in it. For the uninitiated, a DOOM movie without the CyberDemon is on par with making a Star Wars video game and not bothering to include Darth Vader. It was just completely half-assed. If they bothered to do it right, it could have become one of the all-time great cult classics. Instead, it's just an obvious half-hearted cash grab. 1 star (for the admittedly awesome FPS sequence).
The second movie I saw this week was the just as bloody and about 100x as good 1986 classic, Platoon. Now, even though Platoon is only the second best Vietnam movie starring a Sheen (following Apocalypse Now), it's still a damn fine piece of cinema - one of the few from the 1980s that still holds up (others include ET, Bull Durham, Field of Dreams, Star Wars Episodes 4 and 5, The Natural - hmm, a lot of baseball movies on that list...). Look for a very young Johnny Depp - you'll be shocked when you see how young he looks, if you've never seen it before. Also on the cast list are Willem Dafoe, Tom Berenger, and Forest Whitaker. It's quite amazing what a great cast can do for a movie. Four stars. My list of the best war movies I've ever seen now looks like this...
1. Apocalypse Now
2. MASH
3. Dr. Strangelove: Or, How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Bomb
4. Full Metal Jacket
5. Platoon
6. Lawrence of Arabia
7. Saving Private Ryan
8. Slaughterhouse V
9. Bridge over the River Kwai
10. Braveheart
The worst war movie I've ever seen, by the way, is Windtalkers, which is a crime, considering the story it tried to tell. It's also a crime because I'm fairly sure it was the reason I went on one and only one date with a pretty hot girl.
Ok, sports tomorrow. Till then...
posted by k - L - g | 4:15 AM
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